It has been over three years since my divorce was finalized and I am ready to move on to the next chapter of my life. I am ready to move forward and shut the chapters of my past. They have haunted me for far too long. They have consumed parts of my heart, mind, and spirit that deserve to be free. I am learning to let the past be gone and the future be free and clear to do whatever God has planned for me.
Talking to Colorado (aka Blondie & aka Denver):
I said “Inspire me. Ready set go.”
He replied “You’re inspired.”
I said “Okay. What am I inspired about?”
He replied “Being inspired.”
And funny enough… it sort of worked. It made me start to think about getting inspired and inspiring others and what I need in order to do that. It actually came from something I heard on tv earlier. The quote was “Happiness is not but a combination of happy moments. You have a happy moment. And then you have another one. And then another one. And that adds up to happiness. One moment at a time.”
That led me to thinking about the cliffs overlooking Lake Ontario at Fair Haven. I told Colorado… it is my secret place. it is the most amazing beautiful inspiring place. It is the hidden place on the cliffs at fairhaven. You cannot get there unless you know where you’re going. But up there…it is like time stands still and the beauty just overwhelms your senses… The smell of the lake and the forest, the cool breeze and the warm sun against your skin, the sounds of the birds, the way the sun sets over the lake. It is breathtaking…
This place is the manifestation of my soul. It is everything I am and everything I hope to be. This place is where I felt most myself. And the most connected to God and the earth and everything that could be my past and present and future and all of life. In that moment, it was infinite and eternal. In that moment, I give up my fear of not being in control and give up my fear of the unknown. In that place In that moment, when I close my eyes, when I let the wind and the sun wash over me, the bird calls and the lapping of the lake fill my ears, when my senses are overcome by the memory and thoughts of it…nothing else matters and nothing else exists. In that moment, I am free.
A Heart of Grace 