May I be…focused

Today’s post is all about the flowers and being focused…

A lot of times I feel like the flower on the left…still kinda pretty, but, out of focus and blurry and not as lovely as it could be. Which is incredibly frustrating when I know I have the potential to be the vibrant, in-focus, beautiful flower on the right side.

And ALL it took for the flower to go from the left to the right, was a little bit of refocusing of the camera. Just like I sometimes need to refocus the camera to get a better picture, I also need to learn to refocus my mind.

While listening to Leanne Vogel‘s podcast “The Keto Diet Podcast” I felt inspired for today. In her second episode, Leanne discusses meditation and mantras. Her mantras recently changed from being “I am” statements which allow for a lot of doubt and insecurity to “May I be” which promotes a more positive and empowered mindset.

It is very easy for me to lose my focus as the week goes on because I am so busy with all the other things going on in my life: work at the camp, work at the church, being a mom, being a wife,  attempting to have a social life, finding time to work out/be active, managing my bipolar/adhd, being on the keto diet/healthy alternatives, AND all the other things going on in my life. And it usually means that my focus is split seven ways from Sunday and that I don’t often have the time or attention span to do anything fully or to the best of my ability.

And good grief does that leave me feeling lost and overwhelmed and annoyed.

So I want my mantra for the rest of this week to be… “May I be focused.“

I want to be focused on:
– having a healthy, productive marriage
– being the best mom I can be
– being responsible with my finances
– making healthy choices

Well, even that seems like a lot. So, how do I do it? Baby steps and planning!

Marriage: Plan 2 date nights for April
Motherhood: Plan 2 craft projects for Joshua for this week
Finances: Plan a tight budget for April
Health: Plan out meals for this week

It doesn’t seem like much, but for me it is a step in the right direction. We shall see how it goes…

❤ always,

Ashley Grace

Don’t embrace the suck

Looking at my life it’s not difficult to see that it’s a good life; so, I wonder, why do I feel so discontent and unhappy?

I have a family and a husband that would do anything for me and loves me more than I could put into words. I have friends that appreciate and respect me for who I am. I have a decent job that is leading me one step closer to my dream. I have a cat that clearly adores and needs me. I am in relatively good health all things considered. I have a nice little apartment that doesn’t cost too much and is in a decent location. I have a car that is reliable enough to get me from point a to point b without me even having to think twice about it. I am completing the last few classes of my undergrad degree. I am blessed with a gift for writing and singing. And most importantly, I have an ever growing relationship with my Heavenly Father, His son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit.

I asked myself why do I consistently feel depressed and alone and as if I am desperately trying to keep my head above the water? Well… It finally hit me… Even with all those positive things going on in my life, there is so much negativity constantly fighting to be the center of my attention. It has won that battle for far too long; so, it is time for things to change.

I will be taking a step back from the people, places, and things that make me feel the sense of overwhelming negativity that has plagued me as of late. I apologize to those of you that may be affected by this. If I am distant, please do not think that I do not care about you or the things you may be struggling with; but rather understand and support that I am focusing on my own struggles and what I need to do to conquer them. Or better yet, consider it a challenge! Think of it as my way of challenging you to focus on being happy and positive in your own life. Think of it as my way of challenging you to let go of the negativity and embrace a spirit of joy and thankfulness.

Happiness is a choice. And I am choosing it now.